Episode 17

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Published on:

19th Apr 2023

17: What It Really Takes To Be In A Conscious Relationship With Leslie Bost And Juan Diaz Rivera

Leslie Bost is a Trauma-Informed Conscious Parenting Coach and Founder of Sabios Parenting. She is here today with her partner, Juan Diaz Rivera. Leslie and Juan share 4 children and live in Mexico. We talk about what it means to be in a conscious relationship - such a worthy and remarkable conversation! What this means is truly looking at what material each partner brings into the relationship from their childhood, taking responsibility for your own healing, being willing to be vulnerable with yourself about how you show up and so much more. Thank you Leslie and Juan for being here today!

EPISODE TAKEAWAYS (what you’ll learn):

  • How Leslie first discovered Conscious Parenting & holds the intention of living from her heart space
  • How Leslie and Juan made the choice to stay in their relationship at a critical turning point
  • How to define being in a conscious relationship
  • Juan describes how he took full ownership of how he shows up for himself and as a partner
  • The decision for Leslie to stay home with the children & how Juan witnessed her deep connection as a mother
  • The foundation of all feelings for both partners being valid within the relationship
  • How we are conditioned that ‘the other’ can meet our needs
  • The truth of being willing to come back to yourself and trust in the process
  • How to practice the tool of presence with yourself and the other
  • The importance of making a choice every single day

About the Guest:

My name is Leslie Bost, I live a Nomadic life with my husband and 4 children. You will usually find us on the ocean or between Los Cabos, Mexico & San Miguel de Allende, MX. I am a human being that deeply cares. I care about the connection with our children, our world, and mostly the connection to ourselves. I believe that if we nourish ourselves from within, with loving self-care on a physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual level, we will become the change we want to see.

The origin of my story into healing started after much trauma, abuse, abandonment, adoption, eating disorders, deep depression, multiple miscarriages, complicated pregnancies, NICU babies, and all of the challenges that these experiences bring to a marriage and parenting. This journey brought me to healing through mindfulness, meditation, therapy, compassion, and ultimately conscious parenting with Dr. Shefali Tsabary, trauma-informed work with Dr. Gabor Mate, Spiritual Psychology with Suzi Lula, Intuition intelligence work, and most recently NLP & Timeline Therapy. This process of liberation guided me through years of study to develop a methodology by which I help others.

My goal is to guide overwhelmed women, coaches & parents to tap into their inner power, create compassionate inner-connection and navigate life so they can better understand their triggers, patterns, beliefs and connect with their loved ones. I would love to connect with you and compassionately provide a space to guide you to a better connection within and with your wise ones. Join me!

Instagram: instagram.com/sabiosparenting

Webpage: http://www.sabiosparenting.com

Ever Evolving Mother Course: https://sabiosparenting.mykajabi.com/eem

About the Host:

Maureen Spielman is the Founder of Mystical Sisterhood, a podcast dedicated to bringing more joy, healing and expansion to the world. She is a seasoned life coach who supports individuals through one-on-one coaching, groups and workshops. Connect with Maureen:

Check out her Instagram

Learn more about her work at www.maureenspielman.com

Want to join our Mystical Sisterhood Membership community? Find out more

here: https://www.maureenspielman.com/mysticalsisterhood

Email Maureen at hello@maureenspielman.com to inquire about coaching,

podcasting & speaking engagements

● Want to view Mystical Sisterhood episodes? Visit the Mystical Sisterhood

YouTube Channel here: Mystical Sisterhood Youtube

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Transcript
Maureen Spielman:

Welcome back to mystical sisterhood. I'm your

Maureen Spielman:

host, Maureen Spielman. Today I sit down with Leslie bossed, and

Maureen Spielman:

her partner, Juan Diaz Rivera, super excited to interview them

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as a couple and join in this conscious conversations about

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what it means to be in a conscious relationship with your

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partner, Leslie and Juan are very vulnerable in this

Maureen Spielman:

conversation, taking us down, you know, the different paths of

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their relationship, and how they came to be present with both

Maureen Spielman:

themselves and with one another, and really taking full

Maureen Spielman:

responsibility for doing their own work and looking at the

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parts of their childhood that they were bringing into their

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relationship. So thank you for being here. It's going to be a

Maureen Spielman:

great conversation. And I just want to point you to the show

Maureen Spielman:

notes. Leslie is going to be starting an eight week

Maureen Spielman:

mentorship program for mothers. I love the title. It's called

Maureen Spielman:

the ever evolving mother. And please take a look. It's going

Maureen Spielman:

to be just beautiful. She's going to recruit in all of her

Maureen Spielman:

knowledge from her many, many years of studying. It starts in

Maureen Spielman:

just a couple weeks and you don't want to miss it. Okay with

Maureen Spielman:

that, let's go to the episode. Hey there, welcome to mystical

Maureen Spielman:

sisterhood. This is your host, Maureen Spielman. I started the

Maureen Spielman:

show to highlight the intuitives healers and other courageous

Maureen Spielman:

women that I've met along my journey and continue to meet.

Maureen Spielman:

Through amazing interviews, I seek to ask insightful questions

Maureen Spielman:

to uncover ways in which you the listener can apply the wisdom

Maureen Spielman:

and knowledge to your own life. I believe that we're all in this

Maureen Spielman:

together. So sharing healing and joy, and bringing community

Maureen Spielman:

together is both my passion and purpose. If you'd like to learn

Maureen Spielman:

more about the mystical sisterhood community I'm

Maureen Spielman:

building, please visit www mystical sisterhood.com See you

Maureen Spielman:

in the episode. Welcome back to mystical sisterhood. This is

Maureen Spielman:

your host, Maureen Spielman. And today I'm here with Leslie and

Maureen Spielman:

one who I had introduced in the intro today. I can't thank the

Maureen Spielman:

two of you enough for being here with me. I met Leslie, on my

Maureen Spielman:

journey with Dr. Shefali is conscious parenting. And that

Maureen Spielman:

was just a beautiful road, we traveled together. And then one

Maureen Spielman:

came into my life, through Suzy Lula's sole care certification.

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So we mostly know each other from video screen, one I know.

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And you too, lastly, but you live in Mexico, I know you

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travel the world and share for children. And so today, we're

Maureen Spielman:

here to talk about relationships. And I think that

Maureen Spielman:

relationships are something that definitely intrigued me, they

Maureen Spielman:

make the world go round. Yeah, we don't have a lot of training

Maureen Spielman:

and how to do them. And so I know the two of you to be so

Maureen Spielman:

deeply committed to the work and practitioners of desiring to be

Maureen Spielman:

in a conscious relationship, and so willing to take a look at

Maureen Spielman:

yourselves. And I know that because it's the training I've

Maureen Spielman:

been in with you. And it's the, it's what's asked of us as we

Maureen Spielman:

are in relationship with another. So today, I really want

Maureen Spielman:

to look at, you know, when we're in relationship with you, too,

Maureen Spielman:

it's with with anybody, but today, it's with your primary

Maureen Spielman:

partner we're talking about, what is it look like? We all

Maureen Spielman:

come to each other with different backgrounds, or

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different life experiences, possibly our own traumas, our

Maureen Spielman:

woundings? The things that are our shadows from the past. And

Maureen Spielman:

so, you know, one of my, I guess, questions today will be

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around, you know, how do we bring these together in loving

Maureen Spielman:

relationship? Because I think so many times, we come into that

Maureen Spielman:

loving relationship, and then across time, you know, our

Maureen Spielman:

backgrounds be, they might begin to collide a little bit. So you

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know, that it's, it's looking at like, okay, when we hit these

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places, how do we move? Can we move into a more intentional

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mindful space of consciousness, where we're considering how we

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show up in relation to the other? And so that's just I

Maureen Spielman:

know, Leslie, you and I had talked about a few pre planned

Maureen Spielman:

questions, but just to introduce the audience to you. I'll start

Maureen Spielman:

with you, Leslie. And you know, how you find yourself sitting

Maureen Spielman:

here with me today talking about relationships.

Leslie Bost:

Well, first of all, thank you for having us here. I

Leslie Bost:

love sitting here with you and just having this candid

Leslie Bost:

conversation, and especially sharing here With my significant

Leslie Bost:

other, my husband and partner, and like you said, we share for

Leslie Bost:

children and a lot of history 22 years. So, yeah, I am so

Leslie Bost:

grateful to you, and how do I find myself here? I think it's

Leslie Bost:

been, you know, a combination of what the universe has brought on

Leslie Bost:

to my life, and in this in this incarnation, and this soul

Leslie Bost:

feeling of wanting to really transcend and evolve certain

Leslie Bost:

things. I feel it in my, the core of me, you know, like this

Leslie Bost:

sense of, of wanting to be more in my heart space and understand

Leslie Bost:

more from my heart. And that I think, eventually led me through

Leslie Bost:

a lot of hardships, to conscious parenting where we met. And when

Leslie Bost:

I say hardships, I mean, because, you know, through the

Leslie Bost:

typical parenting journey, things that happen, and that

Leslie Bost:

trigger us, and that I thought this is this cannot be the way

Leslie Bost:

and which eventually led me to Dr. Shefali. And that led me to

Leslie Bost:

Susie Lula, who we both share as a mentor as well. And, and that

Leslie Bost:

started to really change how my relationship was with my

Leslie Bost:

husband, not only my children, but when I started to peel all

Leslie Bost:

these layers, there was a disconnect in in, you know,

Leslie Bost:

where we were. And I think at one point, we had to make a

Leslie Bost:

choice, whether we wanted to have this relationship to be a

Leslie Bost:

conscious relationship, or if we weren't going to let each other

Leslie Bost:

go in different ways. And that was a really hard, really hard

Leslie Bost:

time. But I think that that's what led then us really working

Leslie Bost:

towards, okay, we want this to be a more more of a conscious

Leslie Bost:

growth and evolution for us as partners. Right?

Juan Diaz Rivera:

Yeah. Thank you for having us. Good to see

Juan Diaz Rivera:

you again. Yeah, I mean, I think, at the end of the day,

Juan Diaz Rivera:

was just straightforward. You know, we cheer for children, I

Juan Diaz Rivera:

don't think we were going to lay to go like, not see each other

Juan Diaz Rivera:

because we share poor children, but we were definitely in a

Juan Diaz Rivera:

position to have to redefine our relationship. I think as Leslie

Juan Diaz Rivera:

peeled away the layers, it forced her to really take a hard

Juan Diaz Rivera:

look at kind of where she was, and where she wanted to go. In

Juan Diaz Rivera:

that process to question everything. And in questioning

Juan Diaz Rivera:

everything, to kind of question our relationship, which made me

Juan Diaz Rivera:

understand that I needed to be more, more together more, all

Juan Diaz Rivera:

around well rounded, right, I was very unidimensional, I was

Juan Diaz Rivera:

very focused on work. Less, he was very focused on children in

Juan Diaz Rivera:

the house. And, and when it became evident that we would

Juan Diaz Rivera:

just kind of, we woke up one day, and a lot of stuff had

Juan Diaz Rivera:

happened. And we needed to define our relationship again, I

Juan Diaz Rivera:

needed to be more well rounded. So I, that took me to do a lot

Juan Diaz Rivera:

of personal work and a lot of a lot of kind of soul searching to

Juan Diaz Rivera:

understand, you know, how I could be a good father, right?

Juan Diaz Rivera:

Because in this in this moment that I'm that we're describing,

Juan Diaz Rivera:

you know, we got relationship had reached a turning point, we

Juan Diaz Rivera:

were either going to be consciously together or

Juan Diaz Rivera:

consciously apart, there was no, there was no other way of going

Juan Diaz Rivera:

at it. And the consciousness part of it, I think becomes the

Juan Diaz Rivera:

self aware, vulnerable, you know, conversational

Juan Diaz Rivera:

acknowledgement, that the we have, we each have our own work

Juan Diaz Rivera:

to do, and that we each bring all this, you know, the stuff

Juan Diaz Rivera:

that we assembled or accumulated over the course of a lifetime,

Juan Diaz Rivera:

right, just scars and, and wounds and things of that nature

Juan Diaz Rivera:

that that we got as kids and then as young adults, and then

Juan Diaz Rivera:

as you know, in even in our, in our marriage, as young

Juan Diaz Rivera:

newlyweds. And then and then we bring that to the table. And so

Juan Diaz Rivera:

now with that and looking at that, acknowledging that and

Juan Diaz Rivera:

making space for that, you know, how do we what's how do we best

Juan Diaz Rivera:

you know, share this, these children and share this life.

Juan Diaz Rivera:

And so through that took me just to, you know, work that I did on

Juan Diaz Rivera:

my own and work I did with therapists and coaches and then

Juan Diaz Rivera:

through Lessing invited me to be a part of Susie's collective

Juan Diaz Rivera:

collective, which was awesome. I met four other guys that we're

Juan Diaz Rivera:

doing it as well, which was phenomenal. And, and then having

Juan Diaz Rivera:

that relationship with those guys was was fantastic because

Juan Diaz Rivera:

we could speak the same language and then onwards to you know, to

Juan Diaz Rivera:

continue our work. goes from there, your work daily into

Juan Diaz Rivera:

continual practice and then to be invited here with you.

Maureen Spielman:

I love it. Well, thanks for sharing both of

Maureen Spielman:

your, you know, sides of that question. And what I see and

Maureen Spielman:

hear is that perhaps Leslie and one, you may have been on the

Maureen Spielman:

path somewhat even before. But that Lastly, you stepped into

Maureen Spielman:

these teachings that really just opened up your world to a lot of

Maureen Spielman:

new questions. And I'm, and I'm knowing self reflection as well.

Maureen Spielman:

But then there was an invitation for one to partner in on that.

Maureen Spielman:

And like I'm sensing on one side there. I don't know, if for a

Maureen Spielman:

time there wasn't a willingness want to enter into it.

Unknown:

You know, I think Leslie and I have both been very

Unknown:

curious. Just about all things. And I think it's one of the

Unknown:

things that has drawn us together.

Unknown:

One of the reasons we travel a lot, because you mentioned, you

Unknown:

know, and

Unknown:

in that curiosity, I think I've always been a bit of a seeker

Unknown:

of, you know, different philosophies, different ways of

Unknown:

looking at life. But that also made me a bit of a chameleon.

Unknown:

And so, in this process, that where she kind of began, I

Unknown:

guess, peeling back the layers of what she'd become right to

Unknown:

try to find the human that she had been originally. It also,

Unknown:

you know, obviously changes or makes you look at yourself in

Unknown:

that way. And so I mean, yeah, initially, she was taking all

Unknown:

these consciousness classes, and mindfulness, mindfulness and

Unknown:

meditation. And we kind of found meditation at a similar time,

Unknown:

but I was more information about it. And I would really, I was, I

Unknown:

am a workaholic, I'm going to always be addicted to my work,

Unknown:

or addicted to doing stuff. And, and she, you know, I was always

Unknown:

easy for me to justify not continuing with it, right? It

Unknown:

was always a negotiable part of my existence, where work was the

Unknown:

non negotiable.

Unknown:

And I'd say you're a recovering workaholic.

Unknown:

Always. I honestly feel like it's just a daily, you know,

Unknown:

it's a daily decisions, just like a lot of things. But so I

Unknown:

think, yeah, I was reluctant. And it was always because my

Unknown:

work, right? I might, why I'm so busy. I've got all this stuff I

Unknown:

have to do. I've got the pressure of five other humans

Unknown:

survival, and, you know, so on and so forth. And a lot of that

Unknown:

story that you tell yourself. So yeah, I was a reluctant

Unknown:

participant in it. And now she was really, we kind of made a

Unknown:

deal at one point or a marriage where, you know, we had more

Unknown:

kids than then that we can manage without one of us being

Unknown:

full time. And we really had a conversation where we said,

Unknown:

listen, which of the two of us is the best equipped for this

Unknown:

caregiving. And at that time, Leslie's career was on fire. So

Unknown:

she gave up a successful career, because we both recognize even

Unknown:

though she was she's tremendous, everything she does, but she was

Unknown:

tremendous at that, that she was a better caregiver for these

Unknown:

young kids. And I was, so we made a deal. You focus on the

Unknown:

home and focus on work. And it's funny, because we kind of both

Unknown:

were, I think, stoically resentful?

Unknown:

Well, we took it very seriously. So I was like, full on children,

Unknown:

mom mode, and he was full on, um, provider mode. And in this

Unknown:

in this space, it became very lonely, because then we weren't

Unknown:

even though the idea was to work as a team. We really were

Unknown:

working on like alone. Right. And

Unknown:

it little pieces of the equation start, you know, chipping away

Unknown:

at that. But in that process, yeah. I mean, I, I really was a

Unknown:

reluctant participant. I mean, she would, you know, hear you

Unknown:

should reach a follies book, like, Oh, sure. I know, I

Unknown:

shouldn't get to that. And I'd be like, just give me the

Unknown:

cliffnotes. Like, tell me what I you know, tell me what you're

Unknown:

doing. I'll try to support you as best I can. And so yeah, I

Unknown:

mean, I was I was I mean room for her to do what she wanted

Unknown:

when she needed to do, but I wasn't enthusiastic, and it

Unknown:

wasn't collaborative. In fact, for a time, we would tell our

Unknown:

two oldest boys, I remember this, we would say hey, listen,

Unknown:

Daddy has a way of doing things. Mom has a way of doing things.

Unknown:

It's a little different, different. You know, so just

Unknown:

kind of have to Grandma's away different things. We kind of had

Unknown:

his way of explaining and it is true. Everybody has a way of

Unknown:

doing things. But one day I saw the connection that she had with

Unknown:

our kids. And I was like, wait a minute, like, I want that right?

Unknown:

And it wasn't about the authoritative parent that I was

Unknown:

kind of modeling myself after because that's what I had seen.

Unknown:

And I had both models in my home I had my mom who was almost like

Unknown:

my sister, so not a mother relationship, but a lot of very

Unknown:

connected as a child. And my grandparents which were really

Unknown:

the parents in the family in the household, very authoritative.

Unknown:

And I began being my grandparents as a parent. And I

Unknown:

kept going back to like Alia enough my mom is now my

Unknown:

grandparents into terms of her style of doing things. But when

Unknown:

I was a child, it was that way. So I had a great connection. And

Unknown:

I grew up with a connected parent that would, I would do

Unknown:

things to be because of my connection. Also, because of,

Unknown:

you know, other things that I took on as a child, but I wanted

Unknown:

that I wanted, I wanted our kids to be collaborative and want to

Unknown:

do things not be submitted to doing things. And so I got more

Unknown:

involved in when obviously, when, you know, we got to a

Unknown:

breaking point me, I thought I'm gonna be a single dad, and I

Unknown:

don't want to be the authoritative, disenfranchised,

Unknown:

you know, unconnected parent, I want to be a connected parent.

Unknown:

So I got into parents parenting, for real. And I think that was,

Unknown:

you know, like it that wasn't, it wasn't a condition. It wasn't

Unknown:

like, Oh, if I do this, you know, maybe, I mean, I was I

Unknown:

kind of pretty much thought it was a foregone conclusion, we

Unknown:

were not going to continue together. And, and so I was

Unknown:

doing it just to be a better human.

Unknown:

Yeah, at this point, it wasn't like you said, it wasn't a

Unknown:

condition, because I had learned that the more I pushed for Him

Unknown:

to come into this world with me, the more I took for myself,

Unknown:

right. And so the more judgment I had towards him was actually

Unknown:

the judgment of me not going deeper. And I was using my

Unknown:

energy to try and control him to do something, and not for me to

Unknown:

keep going into my, my path. And I

Unknown:

think it's like many things. I mean, I don't, I think until you

Unknown:

reach that point, whether it's in your personal journey, you

Unknown:

know, I don't know, you lose something, you lose someone, I'm

Unknown:

speaking as a as a right, as a man, I think until you until you

Unknown:

come to it. Well, I think everyone has to come to it under

Unknown:

their own terms, but I think men in general, because I mean, in

Unknown:

the work that we've done, and now being part of a collective,

Unknown:

and all the different groups, um, I hear more, you know, this

Unknown:

is a path women find and follow and kind of drag us along,

Unknown:

right. And I do, I don't think you can drag anybody along with

Unknown:

it, you just everybody has to come to it under their own

Unknown:

terms. And we've got some friends that are also part of

Unknown:

the Shefali Susie, kind of environment ecosystem. And the

Unknown:

same thing, I mean, I found, I kind of found my way to this

Unknown:

through maybe, you know, my masters brought him in, brought

Unknown:

in meditation, oddly enough. And then I did yoga to the pandemic,

Unknown:

and, and we found a lot of parallels and the stuff that I

Unknown:

was reading around yoga and the stuff Leslie was reading and

Unknown:

learning around Shefali, that we can begin to actually have some

Unknown:

resonance and have some point of comparison. So we each kind of

Unknown:

found our own path. And the same is the case, I think of some of

Unknown:

our friends that are in a similar kind of dynamic, you

Unknown:

know, guy, maybe, you know, new business, turning a new front

Unknown:

page, maybe, you know, huge crater of a business, you know,

Unknown:

death of a human in their life, something kind of shakes you up,

Unknown:

and really makes you wakes you up, you know, it really kind of

Unknown:

makes you conscious, for the lack of a better term of what

Unknown:

you're doing, what you've been doing or not doing and what you

Unknown:

want to do. More importantly. And I think that's where it

Unknown:

starts, right? You kind of go well, I, I want to I know I

Unknown:

understand. And I kind of want to get to the bottom of not

Unknown:

where I have not who I've become through inertia, right? In this

Unknown:

case, a bit of a are kind of packed on all work and you do

Unknown:

the family, and then all the other things that shape your

Unknown:

inertia, right, as a professional guy, expert,

Unknown:

teachers, and your parents, family business, whatever those

Unknown:

things may be right. And now all of a sudden, what what really,

Unknown:

are you What do you want to be and you kind of need to do that

Unknown:

work go inside and inside going inside in parallel to begin

Unknown:

with, at least in our case, that began to give us another point

Unknown:

of confluence, right, the kids had become logistics and a

Unknown:

beautiful shared experience. And I mean, amazing opportunity for

Unknown:

growth. But it wasn't until we took the I took that and turn it

Unknown:

inwards, that I really began to understand the journey you were

Unknown:

on that we had a lot of stuff to kind of go back and forth on. So

Unknown:

yeah, I think that's that's the net effect of how I guess, you

Unknown:

know, a conscious leadership comes.

Maureen Spielman:

Oh, I love it. There's so much good share

Maureen Spielman:

sharing there. What came to mind for me is, it was a decision

Maureen Spielman:

that you consciously made to go forward at a point that could

Maureen Spielman:

have gone another way. And that you both took responsibility for

Maureen Spielman:

you the way that you were showing up. And I think that's

Maureen Spielman:

profound. And I think it's what you're saying you can't lead

Maureen Spielman:

someone else to the work. You can't make them do it. And

Maureen Spielman:

lastly, I can speak to you know, how you talked about the

Maureen Spielman:

projections you were making on one and I've done the same

Maureen Spielman:

myself and it's the process of really being able to see

Maureen Spielman:

ourselves in that process. And we know that's not solving any

Maureen Spielman:

problem that's coming from almost like I'm going to fix him

Maureen Spielman:

I'm going to change him and if we're if we're with a partner

Maureen Spielman:

And we have this desire to change them. It's just not a

Maureen Spielman:

fruitful, like productive process

Unknown:

or dependent cycle. So we're trying to be more

Unknown:

conscious, but still trying to see us, you know, and when they

Unknown:

don't change, then you become a victim, or why aren't you

Unknown:

changing and so stepping out of that, and coming back in and

Unknown:

that's, so really, that's what a conscious relationship is, it is

Unknown:

knowing that the most important part elements of the

Unknown:

relationship is first and foremost, you and this happens

Unknown:

even with our children, we know that in conscious parenting, but

Unknown:

with our partners, a conscious relationship is having a

Unknown:

committed sense of growth of service to yourself, then your

Unknown:

partner, and then obviously, to the collective growth around

Unknown:

you. But it's, it's this, you, you can't have the service to

Unknown:

the world, for example, and not care for you, right, or to your

Unknown:

partner and not care for you. So it starts here. And then once I

Unknown:

know myself, I can connect to myself, I know my triggers, and

Unknown:

then I can really start to see my partner for who they are and

Unknown:

not wanting to change them. And communicate,

Unknown:

communicate those realizations, so that the other human in the

Unknown:

dynamic can also respond and show up for you and put, you

Unknown:

know, obviously, in parallel, doing your own work to show up

Unknown:

for yourself first, and advocate for yourself, listen, I feel

Unknown:

this assign need this, I think this, and then listen, and then

Unknown:

you know, be in a position to hold space and like collaborate

Unknown:

on it. Because if you just arrive at all those realizations

Unknown:

and don't communicate them, you know, it's a lonely, lonely, but

Unknown:

also be very difficult because the other human in the dynamic

Unknown:

can't, you know, dance with you. So,

Unknown:

and it's so hard for all those listening, who are in a

Unknown:

relationship and are already on their journey, but their partner

Unknown:

is not, whether you're a man or a woman, it is available at very

Unknown:

lonely place to be initially, and not having your companion,

Unknown:

your life companion who you've chosen, or maybe the father or

Unknown:

mother of your children to not be on this path. So my advice, I

Unknown:

guess, would just be, continue to come back to yourself, trust

Unknown:

in the process for yourself, because you're not doing this.

Unknown:

For the other, you're doing this for you. And the other might or

Unknown:

might not meet you. But having a relationship with yourself first

Unknown:

is going to be you know, the, I guess the the desert?

Maureen Spielman:

Yeah, no, it made me think of how we hear and

Maureen Spielman:

we know that we often turn to the other that's the way we were

Maureen Spielman:

kind of conditioned, the other can meet our needs. And what I

Maureen Spielman:

hear you saying is that no, you you go to yourself first to

Maureen Spielman:

understand what your needs are. And to you know, Leslie, I know

Maureen Spielman:

that you do a lot of work around re parenting. And can you speak

Maureen Spielman:

to what you mean by that? Or why that would be beneficial in

Maureen Spielman:

relation to a relationship? Yeah, for sure.

Unknown:

Well, for me, conscious parenting is synonymous to re

Unknown:

parenting really. I think I think we know that at one point.

Unknown:

Shefali mentioned that I don't know if you remember. But she

Unknown:

used the word parenting as like a hook to get parents in because

Unknown:

she knew he had to get to the parent. But they you know, they

Unknown:

wouldn't come in if it wasn't for the word parenting.

Unknown:

Do anything for your kids? Yeah, exactly. And so

Unknown:

re parenting is this concept, which I think is getting to be

Unknown:

more and more well known. But in short, what it means is, now as

Unknown:

an adult, you give yourself all of those things that your

Unknown:

parents could not give you not because they didn't love you or

Unknown:

they didn't care, but they just couldn't they were living with

Unknown:

their projections, their perceptions, their traumas,

Unknown:

their wounds. And there are things that were not needs that

Unknown:

were not met, when you were a child that you carry, and you

Unknown:

bring on to your parenting, your relationships, your friendships,

Unknown:

your

Unknown:

work, I'll give a good example. And this was right around the

Unknown:

time that on this inflection point, but my son has a

Unknown:

remarkable ability, you know, to to be a mirror. And so one day

Unknown:

he did something and I grabbed him and I put him down really

Unknown:

hard on our couch. But the couch I didn't know the couch had a

Unknown:

piece of wood. It was kind of like odd geometry. So when I sat

Unknown:

him down, he hit his bump. And he had been screaming and I had

Unknown:

just not been able to take it. I just couldn't manage the

Unknown:

screaming. And so I went back and I actually did a bunch of

Unknown:

work with with my coach and I did some inner child meditation

Unknown:

realize that I had never been allowed to scream as a child, my

Unknown:

mom lived with my grandparents and my grandparents. Well, they

Unknown:

were children of the 20s. And they were not allowed to scream.

Unknown:

And so you know, that scream, couldn't yelling can be

Unknown:

disruptive. And so I had to go back and do a bunch of, you

Unknown:

know, visualizations and meditation, and, you know,

Unknown:

dynamics, included in talk therapy, to figure that out, and

Unknown:

then to allow for it. And later, I can now be fine with

Unknown:

screaming, I mean, I will, I'll tell you that I enjoy it, but

Unknown:

recognize that it's part of them finding their voice, and that

Unknown:

it's important for them to show their emotions, and that I

Unknown:

should probably do more of that than they than I do. And so

Unknown:

like, that's a way of I repented myself through facilitation,

Unknown:

right to go some baggage that was keeping me from enjoying my

Unknown:

children. Right. And that's exactly,

Unknown:

you know, maybe his need was he needed to be heard, and he

Unknown:

couldn't be heard. And so how can we go to that need when we

Unknown:

were parents, and really hear ourselves and respect those

Unknown:

needs, witnessed them, see them for what they are, and then give

Unknown:

ourselves the love that, that we actually needed? So that yeah, I

Unknown:

love that example. And that's, that's basically how I use re

Unknown:

parenting for myself and with my clients.

Unknown:

And I mean, the reason why having a coach relationship is

Unknown:

impactful in my life, right as a guide is because I can have this

Unknown:

conversation with Leslie and say, Hey, listen, like I'm

Unknown:

having a really hard time with the yelling, right? Or with

Unknown:

something else, I just find that it really just puts me in a

Unknown:

state of mind that I that is not like very cognizant, right, that

Unknown:

I just kind of shut off. Okay, well, let me go, I'm gonna go

Unknown:

work on that. So cut me some slack. And then I'll go work on

Unknown:

it. And maybe over the course of a week, or two, or three or

Unknown:

four, whatever long it takes me to talk to my coach and journal

Unknown:

and do the things that I need to do to work through it, then

Unknown:

maybe I'll come to you and say, Hey, I think I've sorted this

Unknown:

out, right? I need to, I need to make some space for this piece

Unknown:

of it. And please, when you see me do that, like, like, I need

Unknown:

you to do this for me, right? I realized that my love language

Unknown:

is touch. So just touch me gently. Your hands on my

Unknown:

shoulders, hey, I will ground me, I'll come back, right, and

Unknown:

I'll remember to respond versus react. Now, that is not always

Unknown:

possible. You know, we have two kids, two boys, all of a sudden,

Unknown:

one of them's B and the other one up, and like, I'm just gonna

Unknown:

grab one of them, rip them off his brother just so that they

Unknown:

don't hurt each other. Right. But as soon as I calm down, or

Unknown:

as soon as I remove that, then Leslie knows, Hey, okay, that's,

Unknown:

that's okay. Like, if you know, if she still sees me that I'm

Unknown:

yelling are very, like in fight or flight, she kind of will know

Unknown:

how to help, you know, offer assistance, if she thinks it's

Unknown:

necessary, or I will be in a better position to assess myself

Unknown:

because I'll recognize it, and then you know, regulate so. So

Unknown:

it's a way of making space for each other, to either support

Unknown:

each other, if you feel it's appropriate, or just leave space

Unknown:

for the other person to kind of do their own work, write out

Unknown:

their own ropes, so that they can be their own best tool. So

Unknown:

that's, I think, the biggest the biggest piece for me in this

Unknown:

dynamic that has been phenomenal.

Maureen Spielman:

Yeah, it sounds like a big piece of it,

Maureen Spielman:

too, is the spaciousness and to afford one another. The

Maureen Spielman:

spaciousness and grace to, to work our own process, because

Maureen Spielman:

it's not we know from any of this consciousness work, it's

Maureen Spielman:

not a quick fix. That's not why we're here. It's part of the our

Maureen Spielman:

souls curriculum, you know, what we have to work out and I was

Maureen Spielman:

somewhere recently and, and I was so comforted, because the

Maureen Spielman:

woman had said, sometimes, what you have to work through can

Maureen Spielman:

take years, and I was like, and I think she even said, decades,

Maureen Spielman:

it just, you know, thought Thank you, thank you, that's makes me

Maureen Spielman:

feel better. But just to know that it's around the intention

Maureen Spielman:

to you know, work together if one thing that's kind of funny

Maureen Spielman:

I'm thinking of today, too. It's funny or not, is just when we

Maureen Spielman:

come into partnership, and when we come whether it's with each

Maureen Spielman:

other or parenting, we are bringing so many people with us

Maureen Spielman:

generations before us. And our work here is really I like your

Maureen Spielman:

both of you saying that. It's our own personal work because

Maureen Spielman:

our in this lifetime, it's to know ourselves so deeply as our

Maureen Spielman:

just our holiest, most authentic self. And so, you know, yes,

Maureen Spielman:

those voices are coming through and that was our default, our

Maureen Spielman:

programming but what if we were able to cultivate who we truly

Maureen Spielman:

were meant to be?

Unknown:

I love that. Today, we were talking we knew we had the

Unknown:

podcast with you and we were just talking about what our

Unknown:

relationship looks like now that we are more in in awareness of

Unknown:

ourselves. There was five things that we, that we discussed that

Unknown:

we think are important to, to just have in mind when we're

Unknown:

looking to have a conscious relationship. And the first one

Unknown:

is obviously, what we mentioned, initially, what is a conscious

Unknown:

relationship, you're always prioritizing your growth as

Unknown:

well. And that way you can prioritize the growth of the

Unknown:

couple, and then the collective growth, right?

Unknown:

That means that that's just like, you know, airline,

Unknown:

airplane crash survival 101 Put on your own oxygen mask for for

Unknown:

the person next to you. Because

Unknown:

the thing is, we're indoctrinated to think that

Unknown:

that's selfish. And we have to drop that belief. It's a

Unknown:

limiting belief, and because the more that we can come back to

Unknown:

our heart and learn more about ourselves, the more open and we

Unknown:

don't do it to be more open, we just, it just happens naturally.

Unknown:

Right. So so we talked about that being the first and then

Unknown:

the other, which has been giving some examples is taking

Unknown:

responsibility for our own stuff, you know, like, the

Unknown:

triggers that we come with, like you said, we all come with

Unknown:

voices, and, you know, stories and all sorts of things that are

Unknown:

passed down generation through generation. And so taking

Unknown:

responsibility for that, because there are certain things that

Unknown:

maybe the screaming triggered fun, but it didn't really

Unknown:

trigger me as much, right. And I mean, that's just an example.

Unknown:

And why because the way that he grew up in the, what he's

Unknown:

bringing his baggage, right.

Unknown:

And that was evident, because I would look around at people that

Unknown:

you didn't care that people were screaming, and I was like, I

Unknown:

just did not bother them. And it bothered me. It was like,

Unknown:

the noise. So yeah, taking responsibility for our triggers

Unknown:

in our own stuff. And then also, number three years allowing all

Unknown:

feelings to be valid. So one of the things that happens in

Unknown:

relationships in traditional relationships is that we have

Unknown:

this fantasy, the, you know, the Cinderella, happily ever after

Unknown:

that, we're that when you're in a relationship, and I'm telling

Unknown:

you, you know, we talked about us being together for we've been

Unknown:

together for 22 years, is this idea that you're going to be

Unknown:

happy every single day. And if you're not happy, then you're

Unknown:

failing, you know, and your marriage is not successful, and

Unknown:

you're not doing it right. And all of these limiting beliefs,

Unknown:

and it's really going back to allowing, when you start

Unknown:

learning about yourself, allowing and knowing that all

Unknown:

feelings are valid for the person in front of you. And for

Unknown:

you, it doesn't mean that the person is going to be

Unknown:

disrespectful or hurtful, or, but if the person is mad, or sad

Unknown:

or angry for whatever emotion they're going through, to make

Unknown:

space for that, and then allow your emotions to also be

Unknown:

witnessed and, and ask for help if you if you need to.

Unknown:

And that I think one is a what I grew up with this conventional

Unknown:

wisdom that you shouldn't go to bed angry. And that was like,

Unknown:

something passed down as little pearls of wisdom from my mom and

Unknown:

her grandmother. And I to wholeheartedly disagree with

Unknown:

that. But it starts with feeling and recognizing that you're

Unknown:

feeling angry, which is a challenge for a lot of guys. me

Unknown:

specifically, we're just not taught that. So I think going

Unknown:

back to the RE parenting concept and dealing with your own stuff

Unknown:

concept. Really understanding and as a man being able to name

Unknown:

your feelings and acknowledge them. So they you can make space

Unknown:

for them and communicate them. And then you have to allow them

Unknown:

to Leslie's point you may have to go to bed angry, you may feel

Unknown:

like, gosh, I you know, I I want to make it better. And I don't

Unknown:

know if I'm traveling tomorrow, so I don't want to leave angry.

Unknown:

It's okay, you gotta let the anger be angry.

Unknown:

So I'll give you a small example we about because of course

Unknown:

having a conscious relationship does not mean you're not gonna

Unknown:

argue. So we're gonna put that out there. So if you're thinking

Unknown:

that this is a perfect relationship, it is not we it's

Unknown:

not linear, just like life is not linear. But that's the point

Unknown:

that you accept the ups and downs in different way. So about

Unknown:

three weeks ago, I think we had a big argument I don't even

Unknown:

remember what the argument was about. But it was really really

Unknown:

big. And you know, we owe it talking about not going to bed

Unknown:

angry. So we were like, in our bedroom. And oh, I think I

Unknown:

remember now I'm doing I'm doing a lot of schoolwork and I'm

Unknown:

always learning and wanting to expand in different ways and it

Unknown:

just feeds my soul. I love it. But we have four kids and we

Unknown:

both work and life gets crazy during the day. So sometimes at

Unknown:

night, you know I bring my my studies into the bedroom, and

Unknown:

one has communicated with me that You know, if you'd like for

Unknown:

that to be us time, more than because he used to bring work

Unknown:

in. And for me, I don't see it really as work because I see it

Unknown:

as like rote. You know, it's like feeds my soul, like I said,

Unknown:

but in listening to him, when I do, there is something that I do

Unknown:

urgently have to do. And I just did not have a moment because

Unknown:

there was tons of tantrums and things happening that were

Unknown:

crazy. You know, I talked to him and say, Hey, I really need to

Unknown:

finish this. This is the only time this is when my house is

Unknown:

quiet. Because when I the work that I do, I'm in flow. And when

Unknown:

you're interrupted, it's really hard to be in flow. And that

Unknown:

day, Quan was not okay with that. And he said, no, like,

Unknown:

this is our time. And anyway, we went back and forth, but then

Unknown:

other things came up, we were both tired. It's like 1130 at

Unknown:

night, you know? So he started saying some things. And then I

Unknown:

started seeing them from my perspective, which was totally

Unknown:

different from what he meant. And we've just kind of like bump

Unknown:

up. And then our son ended up coming in, or 11 year old. And

Unknown:

he came in and he said, Do you want some child wisdom? He's

Unknown:

like, You guys either need to take a break, or go on an

Unknown:

adventure together. But I need you to stop fighting, you know?

Unknown:

Oh, my goodness.

Unknown:

Well, so it reinforced the concept of savills, right? Your

Unknown:

company, right was a children's Savio. speed's

Unknown:

was one flies once and you know, our children are our wise ones.

Unknown:

So shouldn't

Unknown:

have to come in. And that was not okay.

Unknown:

Which we've now talked about each other. But the point to

Unknown:

this is that when we realized, Oh, my goodness, I travel

Unknown:

the next day, and we stay angry for a few days. So love it.

Unknown:

Yeah. So

Unknown:

he left the next day. And I said, Please don't write me a

Unknown:

wall of text on chat about you being upset, because there's not

Unknown:

going to be productive on chat. We, when you read something on

Unknown:

chat, you read what you think you want to read, and not really

Unknown:

what the person has meaning, right. So it gave us four days

Unknown:

to just kind of you No, not be in fight or flight and come in,

Unknown:

I had therapy. During that time, we both journaled, we were

Unknown:

ready. When we saw each other, we went on a date to the beach,

Unknown:

there was no interruptions, we weren't at a restaurant or

Unknown:

anything. And we were able to then listen and communicate so

Unknown:

and allow the feelings. So anyway, that was a long rant

Unknown:

about, you know, just allowing in making space for all feelings

Unknown:

to be valid.

Maureen Spielman:

Well, I love that because I was before we

Maureen Spielman:

met, I was thinking about how do you repair? When there's a

Maureen Spielman:

rupture? How do you repair and that the allowance seems to be a

Maureen Spielman:

big a big, and you spoke your mind what you needed to ask for

Maureen Spielman:

Leslie? And say, like this would this is not going to work for me

Maureen Spielman:

right now. So Juan, you mentioned mentioned

Maureen Spielman:

communication earlier, that communicate because I think that

Maureen Spielman:

that communication is such a huge piece. And just

Unknown:

you communicate I'm sorry, interrupt. Leslie, you

Unknown:

know, we were going back and forth and and know what we're

Unknown:

talking about how to communicate. And there's always

Unknown:

you have to communicate from allowing for what would love

Unknown:

say? What would love say in the situation? And how would love to

Unknown:

speak because because you can't come at it from just from from a

Unknown:

factual standpoint, and you obviously have to have

Unknown:

compassion for each other. So I think it's an important element

Unknown:

to give yourself that space and allow enough that for processing

Unknown:

to be able to engage from a place where you can actually

Unknown:

answer the question, how would love in this, what would love

Unknown:

say in this situation, right? It's

Maureen Spielman:

beautiful. It makes me think, when you were at

Maureen Spielman:

your crossroads, and you made your really intentions to come

Maureen Spielman:

together in the way you have. Did you sit down and create any

Maureen Spielman:

sort of agreement? Or was that all in conversation? Or how did

Maureen Spielman:

that look for you, you know, like, moving forward? Because

Maureen Spielman:

one that was such a beautiful example of leading with

Maureen Spielman:

compassion leading with from that heart centered space?

Unknown:

We did. Yeah, we did. But it came from a different

Unknown:

place. It was like one said, What would love say and it came

Unknown:

from a place, I did an exercise, I work very closely with him

Unknown:

know who you know, and we help each other when we're going

Unknown:

through things and we did an exercise where we kind of went

Unknown:

above the situation, not mountaintop per se but just

Unknown:

above the situation and was able to go into his energy and see

Unknown:

how he was feeling and then go into my energy and see how I was

Unknown:

feeling and it really gave perspective of not judging the

Unknown:

other but just witnessing the feelings and then witnessing my

Unknown:

feelings so that then I could go and repair Write those, and then

Unknown:

communicate with him, hey, these things don't sit well with me.

Unknown:

But then it's not coming from a place of blame or reactivity or

Unknown:

reactivity is when we're in playing. And this is for all,

Unknown:

you know, partnerships to know when we're in blame, we're an

Unknown:

inner child, there's no, so it was coming from a place of deep,

Unknown:

yeah, of a heart wisdom. And that reminds me there's, there's

Unknown:

a quote that I love by Rumi that I just pulled up that says, Your

Unknown:

task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all

Unknown:

the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.

Unknown:

And so we build these barriers, we're wearing relationship,

Unknown:

stories, we'll build these stories, and then we look for

Unknown:

love and look for love. But we forget to come back. And so when

Unknown:

we were able to both come back, then we could, yes, we then came

Unknown:

to an agreement of certain things that we want to do

Unknown:

differently, and how we can do that.

Unknown:

Yeah, but I think you also meant when you asked about the

Unknown:

Crossroads kind of a bigger picture in our relationship,

Unknown:

right? Not just in this kind of particular argument. Right, we

Unknown:

can also do that came together, and we agreed to have, you know,

Unknown:

kind of intentional touchpoints. To, to check in with each other

Unknown:

on how we were feeling in the relationship. We, you know, we

Unknown:

try to do it often. Just at the end of the day, you know, did

Unknown:

you feel seen? Did you feel heard? You know, yeah, we asked

Unknown:

to speak your language, your love language today, you know,

Unknown:

little things like that, that help us just tweaked it a day.

Unknown:

But also, we have had a few meetings really where we sit

Unknown:

down and just ask check in, how are you feeling, you know, and

Unknown:

the idea is not to get So, so far that coming together

Unknown:

requires a big shift, right, just to try to keep the parallel

Unknown:

lines not intersecting, we're never going to meet right, we're

Unknown:

always going to be on a journey together. But to try to keep

Unknown:

that distance, you know, within something that that feels like,

Unknown:

we're not falling asleep at the wheel, right? Kind of how I feel

Unknown:

I have when we were just kind of like, we're on the super long

Unknown:

drive. And like, you just kind of fell asleep at the wheel

Unknown:

needed to like wake up and figure out the road had gone

Unknown:

into trash? Well,

Unknown:

it's, and this leads into the number four of the five things

Unknown:

that we were talking about, in terms of a conscious

Unknown:

relationship is practicing love with presence, right? And when

Unknown:

we when we decided, okay, we're going to stay in this

Unknown:

relationship, it is in the now that we stay for as much as we

Unknown:

can. And so that's when we looked into you know, if there

Unknown:

are stories coming in, or expectations or different things

Unknown:

we know that we're not we're in the past or in the future,

Unknown:

right. So then coming back and centering ourselves in the now

Unknown:

and practicing love. Is that sounds funny, because you're

Unknown:

like, well, love just is and it is but we have to practice it in

Unknown:

relationship because things happen. And we get caught up in

Unknown:

the day or in parenthood or in work and if you are not

Unknown:

intentional about practicing love and you know, witnessing

Unknown:

the other can get like he said the instead of being parallel

Unknown:

lines, we are perpendicular, and we started going different

Unknown:

directions.

Maureen Spielman:

Yeah, beautiful. Yeah. Did was Did you

Maureen Spielman:

have another one? Leslie? Oh, just yeah,

Unknown:

the number five, you know, we talked number one was

Unknown:

always prioritize our own growth, and then the growth of

Unknown:

the partnership and, and the collective growth. Number two

Unknown:

was taking responsibility for our own stuff, and triggers.

Unknown:

Number three

Unknown:

was you all the feel

Unknown:

you feel is valid. And it's not a fantasy, you know, or rather,

Unknown:

thinking everything is going to be always Happily Ever After is

Unknown:

a fantasy. And number four, practice love with presence. And

Unknown:

the fifth is to play and bring in play. So we one of the things

Unknown:

that we try to do is when we do have dates, and we have to be

Unknown:

very intentional about making time because of our busy lives

Unknown:

and so many children. But when we do we think about play in

Unknown:

side by side or face to face. So we either do activities that are

Unknown:

side by side, like walks yoga, we do yoga together or exercise

Unknown:

every morning. We both meditate, though we're not meditating to

Unknown:

get we're meditating at the same time, but maybe in a different

Unknown:

room. But we both are in our process in these parallel lines.

Unknown:

And we do things face to face like going on dates or talking

Unknown:

to each other. You know, or eye gazing sometimes yesterday we

Unknown:

were we were having fun with it because we're like imagine I

Unknown:

gazing for five minutes I will

Unknown:

see how to process where she was kind of asked to give a talk

Unknown:

about it. And that was one of our points was, you know, I gaze

Unknown:

for five minutes. I

Unknown:

said one minute I imagine that anyways, you don't feel safe and

Unknown:

then that's totally It's okay. You know, okay. But yeah,

Unknown:

playing in the relationship will take dance classes together, or

Unknown:

you know, something that's, that's fun. Sometimes she

Unknown:

invites me to do these ballet fitness classes. They're really

Unknown:

fun. Our daughter love to watch me do it. But you know, I mean,

Unknown:

it's just another example of like, just California, right?

Unknown:

Yes.

Maureen Spielman:

And saying yes. When you say yes to the

Maureen Spielman:

invitation to play it saying yes to the relationship. It was

Maureen Spielman:

funny, because earlier, I was thinking of a question. And I

Maureen Spielman:

was thinking about the keys to the relationship. And I, and I

Maureen Spielman:

thought, you know, for the lasting relationship, but then I

Maureen Spielman:

stopped myself for a moment, because I thought, you know, do

Maureen Spielman:

I really, is that necessary to include if, Leslie to your point

Maureen Spielman:

for number four, that presencing. And being of the

Maureen Spielman:

moment in the moment, you know, we don't need to cast to the

Maureen Spielman:

future just to write because we put so much on things just

Maureen Spielman:

practice in the in the moment in the days, I think one of you

Maureen Spielman:

said, I think Ron, you did in something relation to something

Maureen Spielman:

else, we make a choice every day. And we make a choice in how

Maureen Spielman:

we show up? And yeah,

Unknown:

the future is made up of all the right now, right? I

Unknown:

mean, so many things can happen and day to day basis, that I

Unknown:

think the the key is just the the weight of the expectation,

Unknown:

and the the tacit, kind of, I don't know how you call it

Unknown:

taking it for granted. Vnus maybe, like, Oh, we've just

Unknown:

committed to always be together so I can fall asleep at the

Unknown:

wheel. Because, like, that's what we agreed. And, and that is

Unknown:

something we also talked about, we talked about, you know, kind

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of creating these blocks of now's and coming back at those

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checkpoints, and just being open to the concept that it's not

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forever.

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Those might change, right?

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That like I always tell us the, that I've loved her since

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always, because that's how I feel right? My soul feels like

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I've always loved her. But it doesn't mean it has to be

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forever, you know, or look the same

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or look the same. In fact, we've so we've fallen in love with the

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same person in a different way. Right? Love Esther Perel, which

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you might know, she's a relationship, sexologist and

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psychologist. And she talks about how many times she's

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fallen in love with her husband in different ways, right.

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And but that doesn't have to happen. It doesn't have to be

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we, we used to live for 2030 years now we live for 90, right?

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For that, right. And we also on this path of growth and change,

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and all this stuff happens. And so you just have to enjoy right

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now.

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One of the things that make it for No, when I have couples come

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to me clients, and they say I'm just looking to see how I can

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reconnect with my partner, one of the shifts that we do is that

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the word reconnect is already in past or future, because you're

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looking to connect like you used to, you want to reconnect, or

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you want to reconnect so that in the future, it looks different.

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And then we take away the emphasis of the now. So what

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would it look like if we instead of we say, you know, I'm looking

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to reconnect and looking to connect, because we come up with

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a now so connect and that's what we were trying to do. It's not

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easy all the time. I'm not saying it's you know, it's it's

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intentional. We have to be reminded a lot of times we love

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this conversation because it brought us to Hey, how are we

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you know, and having this this conversation

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that made us revisit some of these things? It was thank you

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for the opportunity to do that because because it was

Maureen Spielman:

fun. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for being here. And

Maureen Spielman:

it's it's so inspiring and, and a full of possibilities for

Maureen Spielman:

anyone listening today. Women man, I hope that it's shared

Maureen Spielman:

really widely because I just think it has so much promise for

Maureen Spielman:

relationships and coming to ourselves just that's the

Maureen Spielman:

message come to ourselves to come to another. Leslie, if

Maureen Spielman:

you'd like to share I always just like to end on where can

Maureen Spielman:

people find you because I know they're gonna want to look and

Maureen Spielman:

find you and Edwin,

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thank you. So you can find me on Instagram at Savio.

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That's S A B I O S parenting fabulous parenting. I'm also on

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savills parenting.com and launching a new course for

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mothers called the ever evolving mother which you can find at

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savills parenting.com/em forever about another Yeah, and you can

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always direct message me or email me through my website. I'd

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love to meet new people and and work with different you know, my

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clients ultimately are my teachers as well and we're all

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in this together. So thank you okay to

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me by finding her.

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I invite him to might

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be a resource share my journey. And if I can answer, you know,

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questions or you know, through the stuff that I've managed or

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dealt with, or worked through or are working through, provide any

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sense of compassion for someone that's doing the same. I'm happy

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to do that.

Maureen Spielman:

I love it. Thank you what a generous

Maureen Spielman:

offering. It's been wonderful. And we'll put everything in the

Maureen Spielman:

show notes, any kind of resources. And lastly, I love

Maureen Spielman:

the ever evolving mother name. When I saw that on Instagram, I

Maureen Spielman:

thought, Oh, it's so beautiful, so beautiful. So thank you for

Maureen Spielman:

being here. Thank you to the listeners for being here. Please

Maureen Spielman:

share with friends family, if this resonates with you and you

Maureen Spielman:

think someone in your life could benefit from it. And we'll see

Maureen Spielman:

you next time. Thanks for you. Take care. Thanks for listening

Maureen Spielman:

to this episode of mystical sisterhood. If you love what you

Maureen Spielman:

heard, please visit Apple podcast and subscribe and leave

Maureen Spielman:

a review and share with a friend if you're called to do so. To

Maureen Spielman:

learn more about my one on one coaching programs, or join the

Maureen Spielman:

mystical sisterhood membership, visit Maureen spielman.com or

Maureen Spielman:

mystical sisterhood.com Thanks so much. I'll see you in the

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About the Podcast

Mystical Sisterhood
Mystical Sisterhood is a celebration of women interested in connection to themselves, community, and the Universe. If you are a woman seeking conscious conversations on modern spirituality, understanding your soul’s journey, contemplating new directions in life, and mystical practices, you are in the right place!

The weekly podcast is hosted by Maureen Spielman, a Transformational Life Coach, trained in the Art and Practice of Spiritual Psychology, as well as Integrative Wellness and Conscious Parenting.

Maureen boldly invites the questions we only feel safe enough to ask in the community of other curious women ready to shift the current paradigm and soar. These curated conversations marry what we think of as our mainstream lives with the mystical.

Each episode infuses everyday women with the strength and clarity to rise above the self-limiting beliefs we have all heard on repeat in our heads so we can step into the limitless possibilities for shining and thriving in this lifetime.

Through interviews with healers, intuitives, and other courageous women doing the work of developing our inner lives, Maureen explores how to leave the lack dance behind, reclaim our worthiness, honor our intuition, and let the light in so we can more clearly see the light in others (and ourselves).

If you want to join this global movement of healers and seekers creating a new paradigm convened by an authentic woman who embodies the transformation practices she promotes, subscribe and listen to the Mystical Sisterhood podcast today.

Follow Maureen on Instagram @maureenspielman
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About your host

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Maureen Spielman

Maureen Spielman is the Founder of Mystical Sisterhood, a podcast dedicated to bringing more joy, healing and expansion to the world. She is a seasoned life coach who supports individuals through one-on-one coaching, groups and workshops.